Foxholes and Dogtags

Hohenfels Weight Control Program

So, I've been in Germany for about two weeks now, give or take a day. They shipped us off into a little military community known as CMTC Hohenfels located in the southern portion of the country.

There isn't a whole lot to do in Hohenfels. And to make it doubly confusing, the unit I'm with is in the practice of calling Hohenfels Bondsteel. At first, I was a bit lost. Until I was informed that they were training and simulating that we were in Bondsteel (which is in Kosovo).

I guess that makes sense.

Anyway, while we are here, they have been in the practice of feeding us. The problem is, we aren't exactly certain what they are feeding us. The first time I ate at the dining facility located in 'Bondsteel', they fed us what I can only describe as Egg Loaf and Dog Food. Swirl the egg loaf in with the dog food and you can almost eat it. If you do eat it, you will still be eating it three hours later.

The egg loaf consists of egg with swirled bits of potatos which protect themselves with a layer of grease as well as some sausage. It is in a pan much like a cake and served much like cake, but believe me, it ain't no cake.

They also serve waffles. Which have the grainy texture of Cardboard. And the taste as well.

If you can't stomach that, grab some cereal, and pour in some UHT Milk in with it, the milk with the rediculously long shelf life. When they nuke it, it takes all of the taste with it.

I guess the only safe bet is fruit.

Lunch is MRE. Dinner is much the same, the tray pack C-Rations, but generally the dinners have been a little more paltable. But it's still army food, and you're still eating it three hours later.

The saving grace is the Burger King on Main post. It is a mile away. You walk. You can catch the shuttle bus, but you have to wait for it. If you want to buy something, you check out the mini shoppette. If that doesn't have what you are looking for, head onto Main post.

The Bathrooms are located a block away from the barracks. If you have to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, you have to get dressed to go to the latrine. There are some Port-a-Potties located right outside, but I wouldn't recommend them. Unless you have to go real bad, and the cold air kind of causes your bladder to be a bit feisty and have to go RIGHT THEN.

I think we're averaging about five miles a day just walking back and forth from Chow to the TOK to the restroom to main post to where ever.

I really don't eat much of the food here. I bet I've lost a few pounds in the last couple of weeks.

Well, except for the Pogey Bait. Did you know they have girl scouts in Germany?

Reasons why Deploying Overseas to Kosovo ain't that bad

Free roundtrip air faire out of the US of A for a full year. (the anti-bush crowd ought to be drooling)
You are paid to eat their food.
Aren't subjected to wearing the infamous Black Beret.
Don't have to worry about making a fashion statement or deciding what you are going to wear that day.
No Income Tax.
No Sales Tax.
Prima Bulgaria
If anybody you don't like hits on you, you can subtly remind them that you are armed.
No rent
You get a lot of free stuff like stylish Fleece Jackets and Camelback Watering systems.
Just mention you are deploying, and everyone thanks you for serving your country.
2 week vacation to Europe.
Soldier Sailor Relief Act
Excuse to buy all those fancy toys you've been eyeballing, like that laptop (love my laptop)
See parts of the world you never thought about seeing (seriously, how many people can say they've been to the Balkans?).
Educational opportunites.
24 hour all expense paid Gym Membership for a year.
Albanian Muslims love Americans.

Ok, so there's my list in the works. If I ever feel like I'm about to scream because something isn't going right, I'll be sure to look back at this list.

OPSEC and the Hohenfels Weight Control Program

I've been hearing a lot about OPSEC lately. Yes, one of those 'army' words that makes absolutely no sense unless you are in the army, and even then sometimes you are thinking 'huh?'

OPSEC stands for Operations Security. It deals with things such as Blogs and giving information about military missions and so on and so forth to certain people on a 'need to know' basis. This blog definitely falls under OPSEC. Which is probably why I don't post to it all that much. I'm limited to what I can post here, due to the fact that it is an open forum and anybody with internet access can read what I write.

What I will write here. Day to day mundane activities that are universal and army wide. Training and basic experiences fall under this category. Actually, what I can't write about is probably easier to explain.

I can't write about specific mission details, if you haven't noticed, I don't mention dates, numbers or unit information. I have mentioned locations, but that is by and large public information. I'm going to Kosovo. My mission there will be preventive medicine. Considering you can google information about the army mission in Kosovo and find the names of two camps, i don't consider that to be classified information.

You won't know I'm in country until I get there however. I like it like that.

Qualifications, Take Two

So, qualifications didn't go forward to well the first time, mainly because I had a faulty weapon. So I got to be one of those people that everyone looks at and laughs at behind their back because I was a loser who didn't qualify.

All of us Losers got sent to the SIM Center to get familiarization on the weapons to make sure that we DID qualify our second time around.

Yes, this is the very same SIM center that produced this infamous photograph.

They popped me on an M4 and told me to zero.

The weapon was zeroed in 9 rounds.

Then they similated a qualification range, complete with 50 to 300 meter targets spaced 50 meters apart. They had me in the prone position and with a 20 round magazine, I was given 20 targets. One shot, one kill.

Um, I missed the first one, a 50 Meter target because of the lame excuse that i wasn't aware that they had started yet. But if you count the gimme round of a 50 meter target, I would have shot 19 out of 20. The second round of shots didn't knock all the targets down, just most of them, but the computer was showing that the ones I missed were extremely close.
The training NCO was calling me lethal and mentioned that he would share a foxhole with me.

So, it WASN'T me after all.

I was the first to qualify on the Simulation, Sharpshooter. While everyone else was still trying to zero, they decided to let me hop on one of the other weapons and just practice familiarization.

The weapon they threw me on? You guessed it, the M203 Grenade Launcher. I was qualifying on the Rifle portion of it of course, but it was the whole irony that counts.

Unfortunately, the computer simulation for that specific weapon was, shall we say, entirely out of whack. Half of the shots were hitting completely off screen, and I knew I didn't jerk the weapon THAT much. Couldn't get it zeroed for the life of me. But for posterity sake, or rather, for kicks and giggles, I decided to redo the infamous 'Not Sorry' pose.

I think the classic was better. Mainly because my hair's been doing some funky things lately.

As for the actual qualification, that happened yesterday. During the day I dropped my weapon twice trying to mess with my equipment. In the army, if you drop your weapon, you drop with it. Because I dropped it twice, I should have done 20 push-ups for each time. I made a promise to the rifle. If it didn't jam up while qualifying unlike the last time, I would knock out those push-ups. And i had thoroughly scowered the thing that morning as well as the night before.

Anyway, I learned a lesson qualifying.

Supported Foxhole Position is definitely my Strong Suit. 19 out of 20, missed the second 300 meter target. That had me psyched.

Didn't do as well in the prone unsupported, it was always the weaker of the two. Scored a 12 out of 20 shots on it, and of all things, I missed a 100 Meter target? Twice??? GAAAHHH!!!

Of course, that was toward the end, where the shifting of my body to aim the weapon had my elbows shifting farther and farther apart so I couldn't get a good site picture.

I averaged Expert marksmanship in the foxhole, a mere Marksman in the Prone, that averages out to be a Sharpshooter between the two.

Looking for any and all advice to improve in the Prone Unsupported Position, becuase I vow the next time I will get expert. I will. That is another goal before the end of this deployment.

Now I owe my rifle 40 push-ups. A little cleaning and some CLP does wonders to an M16.

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